Little Miss. G

i feel very sad and sorry after receiving the 2 sms last night.
deep down inside it felt really terrible.. i wondered, y shud i do this.
but i jus cant bring up another teaspoon of courage to reply her anymore.
i cant even explain y am i doing this.. prolly..
1. she changed after she had her bf..
2. its better to stay a distance away from her.. is good for her n her bf. jealousy. =/
3. i no longer feel i can talk to her abt my stuff anymore..
4. i dont want some feelings to wavered again.. anyway its just wad we call "an lian".
5. my luck of love hasnt been rewarding for all these yrs.

and so..
its better for me to dodge. everything, anything.

i hope everything will be fine for her.. i mean everything. afterall she's the one and only girl i care that much. i really felt terrible after i decided not to reply her. but wad to do.. juz forget me as a fren that wud be much better i guess. call it emotional or wadever fuck.. but i hav no confidence in myself after all these yrs. no looks, no $, no gd qualifications.. practically nth gd.

im just a rough guy.. and now nobody likes rough guys. girls like brainy guys, talkative guys, interesting guys, creative guys, those that will brighten up their day, keep em occupied, make them smile all day long.

Little Miss G is a very special girl to me, prolly the only girl with all emotions. joyful, full of crap, sporty, cries easily.. sentimental n00by. But unfortunately, she's more interested in a guy who she knew less den 1mth. Maybe my method doesnt work in this era anymore. So be it.

To Little Ms G. though u might not see this. But i do hope for ur well-being and rmb to be strong at all times. I might juz be a by-passer in ur life real soon. I miss u.. and im sorry.